sometimes I prefer real paper

Well, here I am again, attempting, one day later, to pass off writing I've done from yesterday. It's true that I love digital. I enjoy the possibilities of composing digitally. It's the connections and adatability that I love so much. But sometimes I just prefer real paper and pencil, which is how I originally wrote this:

One step at a time. It's the name of some cheesy song, I'm sure. But it's what I did today. For seven miles. I got "sick" again yesterday, and had to take my first sick day of the school year. Not cool at all. I was a bit depressed from the whole thing, especially after a long doctor's appointment. So this morning I woke up with intentions of getting mentally right. I figured I would watch some soccer, clean the house, and waste some time on the computer. It would be like most Saturdays. But it wouldn't help me at all mentally. So I walked out the house, and down the road. And I kept walking. 

That almost makes me sound like Forrest Gump, but obviously that's not what I did. But I guess it is kind of what like I did. Except I'm not a fictional character. Anyway, I walked. I talked to myself. I sang to myself. I prayed. I recited poetry and Scripture. I thought about New Orleans and school and girls. I thought about being sick, and how it affects what I can and cannot do. 

After about a mile I thought about not knowing how long I wanted to walk, but also worrying about how long I could walk. I didn't have anything to eat that morning. I drank some water. That's it. I didn't have any money for a stop at a gas station or fast-food restaurant, although I thought about that often too. So I told myself to ignore those desires, because I couldn't fix them, and keep walking. Which is what I did. 

I walked from my house to Close Memorial Park. It is a park that I previously used to frequent on my bike. They've built a new building out there, but it didn't look finished, so I didn't really visit it. I just sat under some trees and checked my phone. It was aggravating to have my phone with me, because I was receiving texts and phone calls from concerned friends. So it was a bit of a distraction to me. But it was also a nice security blanket. 

One step at a time. That's how things are achieved. One day at a time. That's how things are dealt with. I'm of the inclination to want to accomplish something in one fell swoop. I want to deal with things and move on. But often that's not how life works. I'm finding myself in situations that require one step at a time, one day at a time. It's hard for me, who wants to go fast. Really hard. But I'm aware now of the pace. I've reminded myself, and need to continue to remind myself. Maybe through more walks. I know now what it takes, and I'm taking it one step at a time.